The English Gentleman: Where Art Thou?

I like to consider myself a gentleman. An English Gentleman at that. I feel it’s only right to hold the door open for a lady (and gent to be fair), offer to pay the bill, and offer your coat should your partner be cold. But it seems that chivalry is dead, and that less and less women believe that the English Gentleman still exsists. A whopping 89% infact, according to a recent survey. However, half of the women surveyed considered their other half to be a gentleman. On this basis, is it that gentlemanly conduct is now only apparent when love is in the air, when there is a relationship involved?

So what about the guys out there? Do they agree with the ladies, that as a collective we’ve become the sort of people who pick our nose and flick it on the tube, possibly hitting an old lady in the face? Or who belch loudly during a performance of ‘Swan Lake’ that we didn’t really want to go to in the first place? I’m glad to say that of the men surveyed, 93% said they considered themselves chivalrous. But hang on. Nearly all men think that they are gentlemanly, yet very few women would agree? How can this be so? Well, the figures for the males don’t give all the facts. It turns out, rather than the sort of gentlemanly conduct I had considered at the start of this article, doing the washing up is now thought by many men to be sufficient to make them a true Gentleman. I’m a Gent, and trust me that isn’t going to cut the mustard.

One statistic to be particularly concerned about is that 23% of women surveyed have broken up with a partner over the lack of English Gentleman-like behaviour. I must point out that it doesn’t say anywhere whether these are the sort of ladies that wear riding hats as standard, tweed that faintly smells of wee and through their buck-teeth can often be heard saying ‘Daddy gave me this land you know!’.

What you’ve got to remember guys, is that being a gent doesn’t mean wearing a pin-stripe suit and a bowler hat. Essentially, you don’t have to be Mr Ben to be a gentleman. It’s not a look, it’s a state of mind. A bit of manners never hurt anyone, why do you think so many people fancy Prince Harry? Let’s face it, it’s not because of his ginger mop or his love of Nazi uniform (all be it for fancy dress purposes). It’s because he’s seen as a gentleman, a man with real manners who will show a bit of respect.

So here it is – the point. Be more gentlemanly to your girlfriend/fiance/wife and to those you meet in passing every day. It’ll make you feel better, it”ll make them feel better and show you more respect, and the single gents out there might even profit from it. If you do, I want some of the credit. However if you want to go the whole hog then be my guest, I personally think there are few things as smart as a man in a nice suit, shirt and tie set. And don’t forget the shoes. Do you agree ladies?

All stats are from Mr Green: A Casino Playground. This post is by The Gent, you can follow him on Twitter: @The__Gent

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The Gent

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JJ

HEAR HEAR! Act like Gentlemen and treat us ladies with respect and believe me, we’ll repay you with our loveliness. Perhaps we liked a Bad Boy in our youth but those days are gone, my friends.

This Little Lady concurs with The Gent – manners ROCK!
Leanne

Teeny Tiny also agrees with The Gent – I said bless you to a guy on the tube the other day and he said I am the first person to do so since he came to London. I don’t condone him spreading his germs, but I wish he hadn’t been so shocked at my manners.

On the flip side, ladies need to be ladies as well! I fear that my love for my Ugg boots is slightly hindering my Holly Golightly look…
Andy

Sorry but you say that people fancy PRINCE Harry because he is a gentleman.

I think you will find that people fancy “PRINCE” Harry because … He is a “PRINCE”.

You talk about the virtues of gentlemanly behaviour and than champion Prince Harry as a role model, at the same time as listing one of his virtues as “loving a Nazi uniform”. Are you than suggesting that in-order for the average man to be more gentlemanly he should don a swastika and commit acts of genocide.

As for the article, I would agree that the modern day man doesn’t embrace the ‘gentleman’ behaviour.

But is this a bad thing?

A lot of what you mention is basically outdated practice, that is taken for granted in the modern world.

I do not think that the idea and practice of ‘gentlemanly’ behaviour can exist in the modern world.

A part of this is something you have mention in your article and it is to do with what is a ‘modern gentleman’.

Basically times have changed, society has changed and more importantly we are moving (slowly) to a more equal society. What you call acting like a true ‘gentleman’ is outdated and quite frankly obsolete.

The role of the ‘modern gentleman’ is in my view to treat a woman as an equal, and part of that is getting rid of the old stereotypes of roles, behaiour and attitudes that were associated with what men and women should do.
http://www.longtallally.com Long Tall Ally

Manners cost nothing but can actually make someones day however I am somewhat ashamed to admit that if I do something for a stranger such a hold a door open or offer them my seat and they don’t bother saying thank you then I always say within earshot ‘No, no, thank YOU’ in the hopes that they will learn…
Katie Mackenzie

Fantastic read x
http://www.thislittleladywenttolondon.com The Gent

Hi Andy, I totally respect your comments, but I don’t think you’ve quite got the Prince Harry thing right. I never said his gentlemanly conduct was in anyway linked to his choice of fancy dress. Infact I said that people like him despite doing something as stupid as that. And while you say they are outdated practices, I don’t really see how holding a door open for a woman and letting her go first can be outdated? It’s surely just simple manners, which are sadly missing so often, especially in London. I completely agree we should be treating everyone as equals, but I don’t think that impacts on chivalry and manners. I think both can work alongside one another.