There comes a time in ever relationship where things change. That moment you are struck in the face by the realisation that the honeymoon is over…that there is a fork in the road and a choice has to be made. Do you take the easy route and walk away, or do you choose the rockier path – the one that involves a fight and some give as well as take, and struggle on in the hope that the destination will be worth the effort.
There isn’t any way we can know how things will work out. There are never any guarantees. Sometimes, even if we want it more than anything, it ends up hurting more to stay together than it would to separate.
But, I genuinely think that these days, we all give up too easy. No-one wants to put any effort in. At the first sign of trouble, it’s over. As soon as a question is asked, we think the answer is to run in the other direction. Divorces are finalised within 60 seconds, affairs are all too common, the word “love” is thrown around too easily.
So, what are you meant to do when you hit a roadblock…If there’s a difference in opinion that’s so huge you don’t see a way round it, or a challenge that seems no enormous it appears impossible to beat?
In my opinion, you take some time out, step away from the eye of the storm, become calm and rational…and then discuss it. Communicate. Explain your point without getting angry…write things down if you find it hard to get it out.
You’re going to have to compromise. You’re going to have to listen…really listen, not just wait for your turn to speak. And then you’re going to have to take the information and turn it into something positive, make that effort to pay more attention, be more affectionate, put that person first.
The Boy and I have had a tough weekend. Our relationship isn’t easy at the moment; we’re at that point where we make some changes and make sure it’s either a forever thing or we sadly go our separate ways.
But neither of us are quite willing to wipe our hands of this yet. OK, so there are some issues that need to be worked through, but hopefully none that are insurmountable.
Tomorrow we’ll be sitting down and talking things through. I hope there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. He’s a such a good man and I know he wants to make it all right again.
Guess we both have to decide which path to take…and be sure we agree on the final destination.
No-one ever said it would be easy, did they? Wish us luck x
(Header image from Flickr)
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JJ - Editor
Londoner. Excessive Tea Drinker. Foodie. Party Goer. Geek. Email jj@thislittleladywenttolondon.com.
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